SGG(1): Yet Not, But the Grace of God

*Chapter Six*


I sat across from him in the limo, amusingly watching as he avoided directly gazing into my eyes, preferring the view of the cold brightly lit streets passing by outside the tinted windows. I should have offered some form of apology, but I doubt it’d be received gracefully, given the fact I couldn’t wipe the smirk from my lips.

He was pissed the hell off, and for good reason, what I had done was entirely uncalled for but it made me feel better about where we stood with each other, I’d like to think we might even have a mutual understanding now..


The sensation of our furious liplock left me breathless, and I admit Shaw had a way of bringing out the recklessness of desire and wanting within me, but I had prepared myself for a moment like this after our last encounter.

He lifted my shirt and suckle upon the skin above my navel, eliciting a moan from me that I tried to stifle, which only seem to strengthen his intent. We both fought with his blazer and button down, removing any obstacles between the heat of our skin, the parlor of his complexion so pale in comparison to my deep dark brown tone.

I pushed him back so he lay on the bed, with me astraddle his waist, as I fussed with his belt and the button on his trousers. All he had on now, was his blue navy striped tie that matched his boxer briefs and those black frame glasses, an aesthetic which left me in a state of momentary weakness to the whims of this man, I could no longer deny my intrinsic attraction to him.

“Close your eyes Shaw.. trust me, you’ll enjoy this as much as I do.” I whispered as seductively as I could, suckling his earlobe while softly rubbing the sinewy muscle of his chest, making his hardness twitch and jump as it sat nestled between the crevice of my rump.

My eyes darted to my bedside end table, where a scented candle of lemon and peach nectar burned, filling the room with an amorous aroma. I looked down on him as I continue to grind and rock my hips, images of our last encounter clouding my mind, reaffirming everything I’ve felt since then. I grabbed the tail length of his tie, and lifted him up to bring our lips together once more.

“I admit, all I’ve wanted and wished for since the last time we were alone together.. was another chance at this, now that I have it, I can’t seem to help myself from what I’m about to do..”

“Yo, what the FUCK!!?!!”

I had upturned the entire candle, dripping hot wax so it seared it’s way down from his chest to his pubic area, making him scream out like the devil had personally poked him with his pitchfork deep in the pits of Hell.


“Look, if you wanna hit me you still can, I give you my unwavering permission.”

Shaw cut his eyes to me irritably, before setting his sights back to the passing New York City landscape, it wouldn’t be long before we arrived at the entrance of club Elysium. He hadn’t said a word to me since leaving my place, and I suspect he was saying an inner prayer to keep from sending me packing first-class to the pearly gates all expenses paid.

Did I feel bad for what I did?.. Maybe.

Did he deserve it?.. Arguably.

Did I still want to start over with him?.. without a doubt, it was a thought that plagued my mind.

Something about him still intrigued me, and I knew I had to solve the mystery of Shaw McCreed if I wanted to get any closer to understanding him. Was he a spy for a rival company or opposing government entity? Or more likely, simply another corporate shark wading through the waters, making a break for the nearest scent of fresh blood.

I know Famous wasn’t the type to make unwarranted accusations, he had to have caught the man snooping, but was that enough for a witch hunt?

Even with all that said, I was drawn to him like a moth to a flame, or to be more accurate, like a bug to a bug zapper. There was an undeniable danger that filled the space around him, I couldn’t tell if it was a threat to my job, my love life, or something more physical.. but it was there and I found myself unable to escape the allure of it.

As we pulled up to the front of the club, there was a crowd outside, no doubt disgruntled patrons who’ve found there was an exclusivity to those that could partake in the Elysium experience for the night, but maybe that was the norm for a place like this so I don’t know.

Shaw exited first, and surprisingly held a hand out to assist me stepping over the curb gap, he smiled softly, as if to let me know it was also a bit of an olive branch of forgiveness. There was a flurry of bright flashes, as bloggers and paparazzi took photos, no doubt wondering who could have bought out such a premier venue for the evening, and hoping to get glimpse of a celebrity or socialite.

We stopped and allow them a few pictures, before being hurriedly rushed inside by some sort of valet, as it seems everyone from the office was already waiting, and the party had gotten started. First thing I saw was two of the mailroom interns on top of a bar with just lace bras, six inch heels, and pencil skirts spraying champagne all over each other in a drunken frenzy, much to the delight of a few males employees of Arkham.

People that were usually stiff and stuffy in suits, ties, and button downs were loose as a strippers legs on the dance floor with hands in the airs swaying. The music was loud and flashing laser lights cut through thick smoky fog, giving the place an exotic electric energy that was extremely infectious.

I was handed a drink by a sharply dressed bar attendant, who told me Mr Ellison had requested it for me from wherever he was in the Carolinas, mentioning it was two double shots of a Scotch that cost three times more than his monthly pay grade. I didn’t like to drink anything I hadn’t seen made myself, so I just stare at it awkwardly due to my trust issues. Shaw seem to read my apprehension and took the glass from me, sipping from it and handing it back with a smirk. I tried to be brave and followed his lead, nearly choking from the fiery burn in my throat, and the coughing fit that came after.

“Cydnee, over here!!”

I looked around to see who had called out to me, my eyes soon found the VIP section where Cedric, Pastel, Grayson, Famous, and my other co-workers seem to be celebrating excitedly. There was an immediate souring on a couple faces at the arrival of Shaw and I together, Karishma and Famous, the most notable.

“What took you two so long?” Grayson asked, elbowing Cedric on the sly at his slick inquiry.

“I wager they were celebrating..” Pastel quipped, sipping his cocktail with a smirk. “Our dear Cydnee is absolutely glowing like a virgin touched for the very first time.”

“Leave it to you known whores to have such vivid imaginations..” I replied with a laugh, hoping they wouldn’t notice the blush that warmed my cheeks.

“What are you drinking?” Cedric asked, snatching the glass I had been nursing, throwing it back like a pro. “Oh god, Scotch?! It’s so dry.. ugh! Everyone let’s do shots of Cuervo, this bitch needs to loosen up, he’s drinking an old white man’s drink for Christ’s sake.”

As he hailed one of the bar attendants, I noticed Grayson and Aemous were already red-faced with intoxication. Pastel pulled Karishma up with him and they began to sway sensually as they dance to the music, clearly ‘Lit’ as well, while Zachari sat nervously watching on. It wasn’t long before a young Spanish girl with healthy bosoms sauntered up with a tray of Tequila shots, a salt shaker, cut lime slices, and a seductive smile.

“Boa tarde mues amigos, Jose Cuervo for the VIPs.. I hear you’re the guest of honor, so the first shot is on me baby!” She said to me, leaning in far too close for comfort.

She took one of the lime slices and squeezed it across her breast, dumping some salt so it stuck lewdly to the wetness, she then strategically placed one of the shot glasses in her cleavage. By this time, I’m guessing she meant the first shot was literally ON her, and I tried not to look as repulsed as I felt.

“Honey, that poor child wouldn’t know what to do with a good pair of tits if he was a starving babe.. come here girl!” Karishma exclaimed, before she licked the salt patch on her breast and dove face first into the crevice for the shot glass, I looked around the group in shock as they all cheered her on.

Her fiance, Zachari, seemed to growl something underneath his breath as he got up and walked off, though no one aside from myself happen to notice. The music changed to something new I hadn’t heard from Beyonce, it had a nice beat to it that had me tapping my foot. As the Spanish girl departed, Pastel passed the shots around to everyone.

“Where did Zach go?.. oh well.” Cedric asked, but seeing the man was long gone he took the shot for him, deepthroating the drink like he had my Scotch. “OK, put your drinks up everybody.. let’s all say cheers to my dear darling best friend Cydnee. I want to congratulate him on his success and this ‘new’ version of himself that seems bold enough to make all his dreams come true. He’s got a new look, a new cut, a new color, a stank new attitude, and a stable of new men chasing his coattails.. Lord may I grow up to be like dis bitch, amen amen!”

“Okay, okay.. God Cedric, I think we get it.” I cut him off, slightly embarrassed as Aemous and Shaw both cut an eye in my direction, both looking like they had something they wanted to say.

“You’re right, well I’ll finish off with my wish for you, my dearest friend, I wish you get everything you most certainly deserve.. cheers everyone.”

It was an ominous toast but I thought nothing of it, right now, I felt I deserved the world and more, I had worked so hard without asking much of anyone, putting others needs before my own. If this is what success felt like, I wanted more of it, the feeling was addicting. The attention and validation was a hell of a drug, and I was hooked.

The Spanish beauty came back with another tray of drinks, and left a large bottle on the table, she smiled and started to dance with Pastel who was shaking and twerking his ass to the music with that jittery maniacal lack of rhythm most white boys were known for. After noticing our laughter, he pulled me up with him asking me to show him how to do it, I tried to get out of it but my co-workers begged to see my attempt.

With a sigh, I got up on the table and slowly whined my hips till I caught feel of the beat, sinking low into my knees as I wobbled and shook my rump. My African and Jamaican ancestors must have shown favor on me cause I was actually decent at the sexually energized dance, putting on a show that had even had Aemous blushing.

As the song finished I got down from the table, covering my face as I laughed at their cheering cat calls, when I look at Shaw he had a sly grin on his face but seem to be hiding his crotch inconspicuously, making me think he enjoyed my show a little too much. I felt a hand touch me gently on the small of my back, quickly getting my attention, and I spun around quickly to find myself in chest to chest proximity with Aemous. Alcohol was on his breath, but the aroma was still sweet to my senses, he seemed nervous but had a determined look in his eye.

“Can we talk.. privately?”

“Um, sure.. let me just grab my drink.” I saw my glass sitting with the others by Cedric and Karishma, who seem to be having a heated whisper of a conversation, it looked serious given the setting but I didn’t want to pry.

I followed Aemous away from the VIP, doing my best not to look at Shaw, though I could feel his piercing gazed locked onto me.

“Follow me, there’s a side door over this way..” Famous mentioned, as he grabbed my hand, leading me away from the group.

“It shouldn’t be a surprise to me that you know your way around this place, I’m sure you get invited to all the exclusive parties.”

“With your rising trajectory, you’ll soon be knowing the layout of grandeur venues than this.. I see bright things in your future Cyd, I see you amongst the stars.”

“And I see you’ve had too much to drink.” I remarked with a small laugh, places like Arkham and bosses like Jynx Ellison, made sure peons and pawns like myself had a limit to our potential, our wings were clipped before we ever soared too high.

When we stepped out the door, I could see it was a makeshift smoking area in an alley some of the club employees liked to use, as two bartenders returning from their break passed us by on the way out. The air was slightly brisk and the smell of the alleyway was of stale cigarette smoke and burning food from a nearby restaurant, but still, it was quiet and I could finally hear my own thoughts.

I lean up against the wall as I sipped my drink, wondering if I was even allowed to bring alcohol outside, Aemous didn’t seem to care, pulling out and lighting up what I thought to be a cigarette till the smell of dank marijuana fill my nostrils.

“Aemous, I’m surprised at you.. what would your mother say?” I asked mockingly, just a tad shocked, that of all people, he partook in smoking weed.

“Who do you think gave it to me.. [cough]”

We both laughed as he broke down into another fit of coughing, sounding as if he’d hack up one of his lungs, MaMa Ghina must get the good shit from her connect. I hadn’t smoked weed since Cedric had convinced me to try it in university one time, but he didn’t seem like a ‘regular’ smoker either, so I accepted the joint when he passed it my way.


“What?” I asked, letting out a smooth jet of smoke, appreciating the quality herb his mom had given him, it was better than anything Cedric ever found in midtown.

“Your throat must be deep..”

“Omg! [cough] Why would you say that?” I replied barely able to hold in my last inhale, taken aback at his comment.

“I’m sorry..” He offered an apology, as he pat my back gingerly. “It’s just you hold your smoke better than I can.. mom’s said you might enjoy a good joint, she joked it was likely the fastest way to some ass.. um, I mean, your heart.”

“Excuse me?”

“Yikes, anyway we can forget I said that?”

“Why? What if she was right?”

I moved in close to him, savoring the warmth his body had to offer, I put a hand behind his head to pull our lips together in a delicious kiss that lingered longer than I intended. He pushed me up against the brick wall and lifted me under my rump with sturdy hands, till my legs wrap his waist. His kiss seem to steal my breath more than the potent weed could, and I found myself inhaling the succulent taste of his mouth, it was filled with a strong taste of Brandy.

“Well looky, looky, sookie, sookie.. what the fuck do we have here, a couple of expensive lookin fags, aye cuz?”

It was two guys, both with pale unshaven pockmarked faces and smelly dingy clothes, the one talking had greasy brown hair that hung into his eyes. He was also holding a gun, pointing it directly in my face, smiling with a chipped front tooth. The other guy snatched what was left of the joint from my fingers, giving the burnt side a smell before lighting it back up.

“Damn.. and got some good taste, this some fire shit Jessie.”

“Don’t say my fuckin name dumbass, now I gotta shoot’m!” The first guy snapped, slapping the other in the back of the head, pissed he’d been identified.

“Well shit, ain’t ya was gonna do that anyways, they seen our faces.. you know these homo’s like to go round reportin’ Hate Crimes an thangs.. best we kill’em regardless.”

“Look guys, here’s my wallet and my watch, it’s Mercier, worth almost a grand.. let us go and I swear we won’t say anything, I fucking swear!”

I sounded like a little pussy pleading for my life like that, but what is someone supposed to do when two meth addict looking muggers have a gun pointed in your face? I noticed the grimace on Aemous’s face, and it didn’t seem like he was about give up as easily as I was, but then again, he didn’t have the gun pointed in his face, I did.

I start to say the Lord’s prayer under my breath, asking God for a miracle, but not before asking forgiveness for my sins just in case. My heart was beating in my chest like Ike and Tina were having a fight, I wanted to scream, I wanted to cry, I wanted to run, maybe even fight my way to safety. If nothing, only one thing was certain..

Yet not I, but the grace of God was with me..

3 Comments Add yours

  1. Sir Tiggy of Smalls says:






    I really did think he was going to toot it up and allow Shawn into his train station!

    I do not know if I would have poured hot wax…I remember reading about Channing Tatum boiling the skin off of his phallus on a movie set. Hot candle wax. And he still lives. Shawn is not human and has an amazingly calm temperament.

    Famous faked that Freudian slip. He wanted Cydnee to know where the evening was going.

    I am glad Cydnee was not racist and asked Famous to do kung fu. Famous will probably save them. His mother seems like she would have smacked a crying Amos who was teased and admonished him to stand and be proud and bring honor to his family’s legacy and to not waver under the hand of the enemy.

    I have always wondered if I was cornered by homophobes with the object of my affection if they would force us to do unspeakable acts for their amusement and silent enjoyment.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I swear your comments put a smile on my face and have me rolling! Next chapter should be up very soon, now that the holiday is over, be on the look out


  2. I

    He plays games and then plays victim. Maybe I’m biased but Cydnee seems indecisive and seems to be latching on to any attention he can get. Though truthfully I must admit Aemous seems a better fit, but obviously Cyd knows that. He knows that Aemous is a better option, he has always crushed on the guy, but simply because Shawn wants him he feels like he needs to sample both. I’m NOT here for it OR him. LOL.



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